Yesterday, I had a guy from Vivint come up to the door. I didn’t have time to talk to a salesperson since I was getting the house ready for my dad’s visit, so I asked him for a business card. He said he didn’t have any and he flashed one of the yard signs the company gives out. He was acting evasive and physically showing that he couldn’t wait to get away. He wouldn’t make eye contact and seemed really nervous, if not tweaked out. I told him I wanted to talk to my husband about it more before we made a decision and he went on his way. I felt a little odd about the exchange but I shrugged it off because I was busy. Stupid but I ignored the fundamental rule of instinct – if it feels wrong, it’s probably wrong. Never ignore your instincts.
Today, he came back. Either he’s the worst salesperson in the history of the world or he’s a criminal. If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck. When he came up to my door, I missed him so he was on his way off my property when I opened the door. He was with another young man and neither of them were wearing any identifying orange Vivint clothing. They also were acting oddly.
The guy in the picture above? That brightly hued gentleman was definitely not who I got on my front porch yesterday or today. I told him today (at 8:30pm, which is the oddest time to sell home security systems, even in the daylight at night situation in Alaska) that Sam and I weren’t interested in Vivint but thanks. That was the truth – we aren’t interested in it.
Him: Yeah I guess you would think you wouldn’t need it in a nice neighborhood like this.
Even for the most socially awkward salesman, that’s pretty weird…and passive aggressive as hell.
Me: Yeah, well, we’re good. Thanks.
Him: I was hoping to talk to your husband, actually.
Me: I already talked to him and we’re not interested.
Him: Did I even talk to you yesterday?
Me: Yes…you did. I told you I wanted to talk to my husband about this…
Hoping to talk to my husband? I’m not even a feminist but damn, son – really? And you don’t even remember talking to me? Are you high, dude? Wait, that’s a dumb question – if course you are.
Then he kind of walked off with his friend awkwardly as fast as his non-orange wearing body could take him. I called the company to see if he was even in their employ and if he was, to report his weird behavior and assure them I would never buy their security equipment. The guy on the phone was very helpful and let me know that that couldn’t be one of their guys if he didn’t have an identification badge or identifying clothing with Vivint logos on it, much less a business card. As soon as I got off the phone with him, I immediately called the police and gave them descriptions of both men, where they were headed, and hopefully they find these guys and do something about it.
This calls to mind the book my momma made me read when I turned 16 that I will always thank her for. It’s called “The Gift of Fear” and I recommend anyone read it. It’s basically about listening to the alarm in your head and what I said before – if it feels wrong, it’s probably wrong. Is it normal to live your life in paranoid fear? Nope. Is it normal to live your life cautiously? Absolutely. Also, normal is just a setting on a washing machine anyway so I wouldn’t get mired in that label too much to begin with.
Socially, we all want to be “polite” and don’t want to be seen as “rude” but sometimes you have to turn off social convention if a situation feels cattywhampus and listen to your gut. Your gut won’t ever lie to you. It’ll tell you when you’re hungry, you’re sick, and when someone is being shady as hell…so biologically speaking, I’d call it a useful alarm system. More useful than any security setup you can install in your home.